The greatest gift is a portion of thyself. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
A great guy deserves a great gift, right?!
Gift giving for him has become increasingly difficult through the years. Early in our relationship Tom would graciously accept my presents [which generally included an assortment of casual wear from Kohls Department Store] with a smile, a "thank you dear", and then wear what I had bought for him.
As time went on, I had to get more creative with his gifts because I discovered he was returning them with increasing frequency. At first I thought it was because he didn't like what I bought him. Then I thought it was because he would rather pay a bill than get a gift.
Yes, I have tried to talk with him about it over the years, but I don't get much response (he can be the master of dodging topics he doesn't want to address).
My "creativity" has included presents he cannot return, such as original artwork for his office (a golf print), tickets to sporting events, and Message Envy gift cards (several times).
I think I finally understand what is going on. You see, because I have been an at-home mom for nearly all of our marriage, ultimately he is buying his own gift. And this is a man who VERY rarely puts himself ahead of others. Which is why he has a hard time accepting gifts.
Even now that I am working "outside the home" my paychecks are used to repay the mountain of college loans I incurred over the past few years.
Ultimately I cannot ever purchase the two things in life he desires most:
TIME AND PEACE OF MIND.
My only alternative now is to leave it up to God and to buy the one thing that MIGHT give him SOME of both time and peace of mind...THE WINNING LOTTERY TICKET!
Because Tom has always been so good about putting others first (whether it is personal or business related) I hope God will let this be "the ticket" Tom needs to step into peace.
If not, I guess he's always got me to listen, encourage, wash his stinky sweaty workout clothes, make mediocre dinners a few nights a week, watch movies with, laugh at his jokes, give him hugs, and of course...nearly kill him with my gas during the night. Wah!
Happy Birthday Pumpkin!