It’s that time of year again…
Halfway to the big 5-0h.
Or as my husband likes to remind me, halfway to NINETY.
Not that it’s bothering me.
You know how people say age is just a number? Well, I get it now.
It. Is. Just. A. Number.
Although I see more creases and jiggles in the mirror these days, and I am thickening and thinning out in all the places I would rather not be, I realize I can do diddley squat about it, so I choose to embrace the slow physical decline.
Although, rest assured, I ain’t going down without a fight!
Today, for the most part, is just like any other day. Husband goes to work, kids go to school, I workout and run errands, maybe we go out for dinner. All wonderfully mundane, just like any other day God gives me to live.
Not to sound morose on my special day, but I have had this “gut” feeling for several years now that I won’t live past sixty. Although [as far as I know] I am in perfect health and have no other concrete evidence to support my intuition, the feeling persists. It has been an underlying current towards what I do and how I live my life for some time now. I believe it even has something to do with my compulsion to write.
Because I realize, even if I do live past sixty, time DOES run out.
I have shared this little tidbit of information with my husband on several occasions. Tom likes to joke with me and ask if I would help him find my replacement before I go. My response generally runs like this, “Just find someone who possess all the qualities you love about me…and none of the ones you dislike, THAT will be your perfect match. Oh, and don’t forget she needs to be rich this time around.”
Whatever length of time I am given, I want to be a continuous learner of the things that mean the most in my life. Improving relationships, helping others, using music and books to help me better understand this world. I will continue to strive to take life seriously when I need to, and laugh at it [and myself] when the opportunity arises.
Gratitude for the opportunity to “be” in the world another day is the best gift I could ever receive.